Life Misled- Corporate Attitude

So, I got my first corporate paycheck and instead of using the money to bail myself out of my shitty life, I went on a bender this weekend and drank myself unconscious and then bought a two hundred dollar pair of sunglasses ’cause all of a sudden I can do shit like that now that I’m not relying on the two hits a day I get from this website. I guess when you write stories about your shitty personal life and try to tie them into celebrity pictures, no one really gives a shit.

Speaking of shitty lives and not givin’ a shit, Bianca Gascoigne was in a bikini with her idiot friend Charlotte Marbella and acting like a high school lesbian girl that found out that pussy was better than dick until she smelled one. Anyway, Gascoigne’s dad was off this weekend trying to commit suicide while this bitch was carrying her stupid friend around and showing off their bodies in England somewhere.

I’m thinkin’ if I had a useless daughter that was only known for dating some motherfucker who played soccer, I might try to kill myself for realizing that my sperm is as useless as she is and that I brought that useless slut into this world. I think I’d also be partially jealous that my jizz is living the high-life with some motherfucker that has a lot more money than I did instead of being bleached out of my sheets weekly or drying on my walls after I beat off and realize I can’t afford tissues…

All I know is Bianca Gascoigne is one girl dude should’ve rubbed out in the shower like I do ’cause it’s a time saver and costs less. Bitch is about as useful as an asshole on your elbow. Bitch got a body though and that’s all that matters in terms of this website. So take your moral high ground and go fuck yourself.

Here are some pictures of Bianca Gascoigne and Charlotte Marbella being useless English soccer wives ’cause it’s not what you do, it’s what you look like doin’ it…